Monday, August 22, 2005

Shamelessly plagiarised from an Everything2 noder

A few ways to stay single, at least as far as said noder has been able to determine:

- Be reasonably attractive and intelligent. Everyone will assume you're taken.
- Don't regularly go to bars. I don't care whether or not you drink, if you don't go to a bar to do it, or if you don't do it at all, you are seriously limiting yourself in potential mates. Excellent way to stay single.
- Also good is if you refuse to date anyone you work with. Given modern life, most folks don't get to meet many people anywhere else once leaving school. Of course, there's actually some sense behind not dating people you work with, but that doesn't stop most folks. Hey, at least it gives me something to talk about on my lunch break.
- Like yourself, or really like your job, or have something satisfying in your life. If you have this, what can you use to strike up a conversation? I mean, what if you don't have an unhappy childhood to complain about? What will you discuss then? Television?
- Don't give a shit about where the toilet seat is, how you squeeze the toothpaste tube, or which way the toilet paper roll is put on. This is a bit more long term, but remember, eventually you will need to have things to argue about to keep the relationship alive.
- And of course, the easiest way to stay single is to have in mind exactly what you want from a relationship with someone. You're better off dating yourself at that point.

Well I’ll be jiggered if every single one of these doesn’t apply to me (at least I like to think the first one does).